JoAnn Stover - Online Memorial Website

Jo. That's what I started calling you a couple years ago. We agreed and you tried calling me Bobbi. How many decades did we laugh together? How many kinds of laughter? We walked together, traveling from new home to each new home, changing addresses each year, following each other's path as we moved in different directions. You were my advisor, always wiser. My favorite walks were the last ones—along the Hampton beach as you settled into this last part of life. I felt you leaving patiently. I hope to learn from that and from your humor. You saw things early. "Simplify!" you proclaimed in your letter, still illustrating its borders. Each new place held only things that mattered—Pictures of your kids and by them. A space to paint and write. A smaller one to eat in. A soft seat for a friend. A perfect kitchen space with the familiar tschotchkis around you that follows us from home to home. You made sure you were near your families. Jo, You laugh softly, I hear you. Tender and shy sometimes. I know your book of color. You are the book.

We never had our tea together face to face, but met many times in spirit. If I had been with you on that last day I would ask you where you gathered the courage to keep on keeping on, and if the courage came to you in small, perhaps even unnoticed moments: while reading the many books you loved to read and shared with friends; or waking in the mornings and deciding to get up just one more day. Did it come in conversations with those you loved, or writing letters while medicines were being transported into the body through IV. Was it hidden in those hours of creative fantasy when you painted gifts to give away, or while sharing communion with small stones between friends. Dear letter-friend, your courage inspired me all these years of the body's journey with cancer. It inspires me now. Thank you. You were a grand pen pal, a gentle and loving mentor. We never had our tea together face to face, but met many times in spirit. I invite you still to come to for tea.

Jo Ann, Through all the years as we learned how to make a family, you never waivered  your dedication to your art and your loved ones. As the son-in-law I looked for ways to be in the family: sometimes successful, sometimes not. Through it all you taught me what courage is; to keep on with one's love and inspiration even when you just did not feel good. Your work is done and your peace well earned. Love, Stephen